Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Jules Renard
"Failure is not the only punishment for laziness; there is also the success of others."
Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
"What a blessing it would be if we could open and shut our ears as easily as we open and shut our eyes!"
Hob Broun
"Realism...has no more to do with reality than anything else."
Unknown
"He's the kind of a guy who lights up a room just by flicking a switch."
James Branch Cabell
"There is not any memory with less satisfaction than the memory of some temptation we resisted."
Zsa Zsa Gabor
"I know nothing about sex because I was always married."
James Thurber
"Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?"
King Farouk of Egypt
"The whole world is in revolt. Soon there will be only five Kings left--the King of England, the King of Spades, The King of Clubs, the King of Hearts, and the King of Diamonds."
Hansell B. Duckett
"What this country needs is more free speech worth listening to."
Quentin Crisp
"Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level."